renay: ALERT: one of these things is not like the other!

Renay (

renay) wrote,
@ 2009-06-05 01:33 am UTC

Entry tags:

oops! had an opinion, sexism, skfgksjdgfkafff

ALERT: one of these things is not like the other!

Internets! Oh, internets. Sometimes I feel like I should break up with feminism; like I should say, "hey, it's been great, but the more I learn the more I want to run when I see you coming!" or maybe I could use the tried and true, "It's not you! It's me! I like to overreact and cause problems and threaten my blood pressure!" I am not good at disengaging or picking my battles. Especially that last one: I have to pick? I can't go around calling all people on their sexism regardless of depth of feeling? But why?

I submit for your examination two covers of a book I read recently, The Forest of Hands and Teeth. The U.S. cover is followed by the German one. I like both the covers; I think both put the emphasis on Mary, where it belongs, and not the zombies. The German cover is spookier than the U.S. cover. I probably like it better because of the use of color (specifically the red, and anyone who has read the book will know why) and the depth to the cover—looking into the forest. The girl is still prominent! That's enough for me.

U.S. and German covers of The Forest of Hands and Teeth

U.S. and German covers of The Forest of Hands and Teeth

Yesterday I was reading along in Google Reader and I opened this post by BookChic. Well, then my entire night went downhill because that post linked to this one, where I found the cover being discussed. The first thing I see is the one thing that drives me crazy but I can never define why, but this is why I have an

owlmoose, to sit me down and say, "Renay, I am sorry but you are allergic to hyperbole." To which I respond, "NO WAY! Hyperbole and I go way back, we are B.F.F.!" to which she says that perhaps I have a problem with hyperbole that offends me. I was pretty offended, internets! Let's talk about HYPERBOLE FAIL!

"You might as well have hung a sign on the cover that says, "NO BOYS ALLOWED WITHIN 10 FEET OF THIS BOOK!"

God, I know, right. There's a girl on this cover! What self-respecting boy would go anywhere near that shit with a ten foot pole. It might give the impression that, geez, they like to read about girls and girl stuff and feelings and then all their pals would be like, "you like GIRLS" and so continues the wonderful meme of girls and femininity as a slur, a derogatory remark, an insult. I especially love HYPERBOLE that continues that meme, instead of perhaps stopping to go, "Gee, is using hyperbole to dismiss books about girls offensive at all? LET ME THINK LONG AND HARD ABOUT MY NEXT ACTION."

It gets even better!

Even as an adult man who is quite secure in his masculinity, I was reluctant to buy this when I saw the cover. Perhaps, I thought, it's not as awesome as I've heard! Why would they put such a lame cover on an awesome book!

Because adult men who are secure in their masculinity worry about covers that have girls on them; didn't you know? I am very convinced by the case he makes about his MASCULINITY, which is SECURE, but yet this book still made him pause to go, "oh, it has a girl on it and nothing else. gosh, I thought this was about ZOMBIES. Maybe they lied to me and this girl on the cover means the book sucks." As if the quality of the book that was written months before changed between "what's the cover look like!" and "oh, it's a GIRL and nothing else." Smarter people have said, "he's just saying the cover is boring" but all I'm getting is: EW, COOTIES. I could be wrong! After all, I agree the German cover is more engaging, but I also believe that the U.S. cover is, if not as engaging, appropriate to the quiet seriousness of the story, the cover art invoking a sense of stillness that defines Mary's world in her village.

BUT WAIT. There's more! I must now place a trigger warning here for totally thoughtless commentary, which boggles my mind. I didn't think the annoying hyperbole would come to this! Our MASCULINE DUDE, who is SECURE, responds to BookChic! It is so exciting.

Here's a book that boys would probably enjoy reading, and they make it look like a romance novel, or one of those "girl who's nonthreateningly ethnic comes of age and gets sexually assaulted" books that come out every two weeks or so.

Here's something I want you to think about, internets—careful consideration, mind you—does this comment make you want to take a hot shower? Because it is gross. This derision to books about sexual assault aimed at girls and women is delicious! I wonder if SECURE and MASCULINE DUDE has considered that the reason books about sexual assault keep appearing, over and over and over again is because sexual assault continues to happen. I love this! I have no idea how "ew, there's a girl with nothing else on this cover so it's boring" turns into "I'm just going to slag off books about sexual assault! Look at this awesome comparison I made, guys!" You know, because girls and women should just shut up about sexual assault already and stop reading the literature about it so that publishers stop publishing so much of it, god! WHY ARE YOU SO DEMANDING, you people with vaginas! Seriously, books with zombies should appeal to boys regardless of what's in them, because you girls already have those useless sexual assault books aimed at you! What whiners.

IN CONCLUSION: I agree that covers should appeal to both boys and girls in order to get reluctant male readers to read for now. Never say I don't believe in compromise! However, it is not addressing the true problem that female and about women and girls has negative connotations for men and boys. Just look at your test case, SECURE and MASCULINE. The best remedy for this is to not completely cater to this demographic, but to compromise and then teach them that reading about girls is just as fun as reading about boys, and girls are awesome! Male should stop being default. Men should stop promoting male as the default with hyperbole that fails! Posts like this play into the COOTIES meme, furthering the idea that boys should never have to be bothered with "girly" covers? Yeah, keep on othering women and girls, male authors! I am sure that is going to end well for you. Please let me know how it goes!

Seriously, seriously! *paperbag*

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Cover Charge
(Anonymous)
2009-06-05 09:48 am UTC (link)

Tried to use my openid, but it's not working. Anyway, it's me, Brendan Halpin, www.brendanhalpin.com.

Well, I think part of the problem here is just that you and I don't share a sense of humor. It's only recently that people unfamiliar with me and my work have started reading my blog, and so perhaps I need to reexamine the way I present things. If you read the rest of my blog, I tend to write in that smart-assy way about just about everything.

A couple of things. The sexual assault thing. Women I love have been sexually assaulted and I know it's a very real and horrible problem. What I object to is the way that so many coming of age books for girls seem to use sexual assault: "Here's the point at which our protagonist finds she's not a girl anymore, and that her sexuality is FRAUGHT WITH DANGER." Now, certainly these dangers are real, but as the father of two daughters, I don't want them to think the totality of female sexuality consists of threat and danger, and, for a variety of reasons, nobody ever seems to write the book about the girl who comes of age and discovers sex and finds that it's pretty fun. (Forever, maybe? It's been a long time since I read that.)

We're not going to agree on the cover, so that's fine, but really, I didn't invent this idea that boys don't want to read books with a girl's head as the main feature of the cover. A cover is part of the marketing strategy of the book, and these images are carefully chosen for who the publisher wants to read them. My novel Long Way Back had a silhouette of a man holding a guitar for the hardcover. The paperback features a woman who has nothing to do with anything in the book. I was told this was because the original cover wasn't woman-friendly.

I certainly agree that boys should read widely about a variety of subjects and protagonists. But, more crucially, they should read. My YA novel Long Way Back was rejected by several publishers because "It's a boy book, and boys don't read." (the publishers' words, not mine.) It's fine to say the average 14-year-old boy should be more enlightened. Absolutely. But realistically, I think publishers should help boys along a little bit. I think the German cover is much better, and a good example of meeting halfway.

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Re: Cover Charge

owlmoose
2009-06-05 03:22 pm UTC (link)

"I didn't invent this idea that boys don't want to read books with a girl's head as the main feature of the cover."

And no one ever said that you did. When I talked with

renay about your initial post, we agreed that you brought up a real issue, although I see some disagreement about how "girly" this particular cover is. That's not what this post is about, though. What it is about is the "Ewwwww, this book has a girl on the cover so it must be for girls and therefore it is icky" tone of your comments. Encouraging boys to read is one problem; perpetuating the meme that "boy things are awesome and girl things suck" is another, and that's what I see

renay taking issue with here.

How do we tie these things together? Here's a thought: maybe the reason boys don't read is because they see it as a "girly" thing. Maybe if we could do a better job of breaking down all the barriers we've created between "boy stuff" and "girl stuff", boys would be more willing to embrace reading. Wouldn't that approach be better, not just for getting boys to read, but also for making the world better?

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Bingo!

renay
2009-06-05 08:05 pm UTC (link)

I think the least of the problems is about sense of humor, and that's a sticky path to go down, period, because that is like saying "WHY SO SERIOUS, you humorless feminist?" When you make it about sense of humor, you're saying to the people who are not amused that they just don't get it. If we go down that path, I'll have to pull out my Sexist Bingo Cards and no one wants that, but heads up: you just used a sexist tactic! We will continue to disagree over the cover issue because I am a girl and read dismissive comments like yours all the time, everywhere, but I am fine with that. You are entitled to your opinion! I am entitled to boggle and gnash my teeth. There's a good chance you won't see these comments like I do, as I have a uterus and no male privilege.

Of course you didn't invent the idea, I never said that. The publishing companies exist in a culture that is sexist. When boys (and men) deride books with girls on the cover, or with female protagonists, they are taking part in the sexist system they were born into, where parents and media were busy othering girls and teaching boys how to make girls second-class at all times. Blue for boys and pink for girls, right? When publishers make these decisions, they are taking part in the system of sexism so firmly entrenched that it's normal. You cannot escape this system. I cannot escape this system. It's no good to pretend we can. It doesn't mean most men and boys hate girls and women. It just means they are participating in a system where male is the default.

So what I'm saying is: our culture is sexist. Marketing is sexist. The publishing companies are marketing to a sexist audience; even I see that. The industry under it can also take part in that system, by saying "this book will never appeal to boys!" instead of "I wonder how I could get boys to read this book?" It's the blue versus pink argument, over and over and over, where girls can like pink and blue but boys are only expected, nay, ENCOURAGED to like blue. The German cover meets in the middle; we both agree. Makes me wonder about equality and reluctant male readers in that country. But the truth is, our sexist publishing industry will never, ever improve if authors and industry folks maintain low expectations. All I'm asking is: don't other girls while trying to make a case for why boys aren't going to read this lame book because of this girl on the cover. Othering is bad and we shouldn't do it, period, not even to be cute or funny. It is, as the famous cat macro said, srs bizness.

Meanwhile, the comment you left in reply to BookChic was grossly inappropriate. I still do not see why the cover issue was compared to the issue of books about sexual assault, or why you chose that comparison. There is a reason I put a trigger warning before the quote: because it isn't okay to simply throw that around, regardless of what women you know and their experience with assault. I was shocked, and alarmed, and uncomfortable when I read it. Perhaps I also come from safe, feminist, spaces, where sensitive topics need appropriate warnings. There comes a point that if someone who doesn't know you, is not biased by your personality says, as a woman, "Hey, that was kind of skeevy for you to say!" it's a good idea to look closely at your words and see why comments you didn't intend to be hurtful and gross and dismissive toward women were, surprise, hurtful and gross and dismissive toward women. Your comment was not okay, it does not matter you know women who have been assaulted, it was not okay.

Also: tons of people are writing about how sex is fun and positive in YA. If I didn't read YA myself I would be reading your comment going, "geez, is YA lit embracing The Last House on the Left levels of ick?" but I do. YA is full of positive examples of female sexuality. If you're concerned with how girls come to understand themselves, their sexuality, and their world, start small by not writing posts that other them, furthering the idea that, as

owlmoose said, "boy things are awesome and girl things suck".

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Re: Bingo!
(Anonymous)
2009-06-12 10:50 pm UTC (link)

OpenID still not working for me on this site, but it's me, Brendan, again.

Well, what I meant was that we don't seem to have the same sense of humor--I think you acknowledged that in the hyperbole part of your original post.

I guess I still don't understand why you're SO ANGRY with the italics and the CAPS LOCK. It seems like your anger is kinda disproportionate to my "offense". I was trying to say, in my smartassy way, that this book, which has obvious appeal across gender lines, is being marketed exclusively to girls, and that's a shame.

Boys and girls are different and tend, in general, to like different kinds of things. I don't think acknowledging this makes me some kind of war criminal. But then, I also don't think other is a verb.

I also don't think you are the arbiter of what's okay to say. I'm not sure what constitutes grossly inappropriate for a blog comment. I also don't think you can really say what I wrote was offensive to women. Offensive to you, okay, but geez--you speak for half the human race now? That must get exhausting.

Righteous indignation is tons of fun, but I think it's actually counterproductive if you want to impact people's ways of thinking.

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	Hello! Our conversation over this topic is over. renay 2009-06-12 11:42 pm UTC (link)
	By ignoring the content of my replies and also by using the classic derailing tactic of making it about my feelings with the "why are you so angry?" plea, you are attempting to discredit my arguments and frame the discussion so you can be "correct". Therefore, I am finished! Farewell! (Replies frozen) (Thread from start) (Parent)

shanaqui
2009-06-05 09:52 am UTC (link)

Agreed! I know the cover is the first thing you see and it's supposed to be designed to appeal to its audience, but if you've heard a book is good and the cover makes you wince, why don't you give it a chance anyway, at least as far as picking it up and reading the first few pages? Argghhh.

Mind you, I understand the mentality of "oh, not another book in which sexual assault happens". I swear every book I pick up lately has had some form of sexual assault in it, and it isn't even always a plot point, it's just there to make the female character have an ~omgtragic~ past. It's gratuitous and usually written terribly, with the female character cringing away from intimacy until she ~finds her true love~ who heals her trauma with his cock. It is not only a problem in fanfic! But I really don't see how it's related to a picture of a girl on the cover... it pops up everywhere, no matter what the cover looks like.

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From Squeem!
(Anonymous)
2009-06-05 02:06 pm UTC (link)

I AGREE. I am going to just reply to one bit of this, though, because if I tried to reply to the rest I would just start frothing at the mouth.

But here it is: Why would they put such a lame cover on an awesome book!

GEE, I've often wondered this about fantasy and sci-fi books! WELL THIS COVER SUCKS, I mean, the people on it don't even look like people and oh hey! The women are almost naked. This book looks like it's going to suck, I mean, the cover is just soooo lame. I make it a policy to never read books that have lame covers.

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	Re: From Squeem! renay 2009-06-05 07:45 pm UTC (link)
	I love you, Squeem. SO MUCH. HEARTS (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	(Anonymous) 2009-06-16 02:12 am UTC (link)
	Renay, hows about we stop buying books with men on the cover? Because who wants to read an icky novel with things like guns and action and half-naked chicks. EWWWW BOY STUFF!!!!!! Kim L (boldblueadventure.blogspot.com) (Reply to this) (Thread)

	renay 2009-06-17 07:09 pm UTC (link)
	It would feel so good, but they wouldn't get it. In fact, I'm pretty sure we'd be feminazis or man-haters for even considering it. Funny how that works, right? (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

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